They're ALWAYS watching

People may not do what you tell them to do, but they WILL do what YOU do, so be careful and deliberate about what you do. As General George Patton said, “We’re always on parade.”

 

    It’s the very first Black Thanksgiving! You know, when stores started opening up with HUGE (Yeah, RIGHT!) sales Thanksgiving evening. 

 

    My daughter, Elyse, invites me to go with her to Walmart this particular Thanksgiving evening. I love her so much that I accept. Actually, there IS something I want to buy, because it’s “half price!” I never did the research to see what the original price was, but the ad said “half price” so I’m in. ALL IN!

 

    Here’s what was bumfoozling, the sale starts at 2300 (11 PM for you non-military folks.). Got that. But Walmart is open 24 hours. How’s THAT gonna work? Not very well, really, read on….

 

    We figure there will be a lot of folks taking advantage of all the great sales tonight, so we’d better get there early. If nothing else, we can get in line. I LOVE getting in line. I’ve served in the Air Force for 50 years. I KNOW how to get in line. Sometimes, at a store, I’ll see a line and get in it. I don’t have to know what the line is for. It’s a line. I’ve been trained. I get in it. It’s a habit.

 

    SO, we get to Walmart about 2200 (10 PM.) As expected, there are hundreds of people throughout the store. And there are lines. I’m like a puppy on a leash. Let me get in line, PLEASE!

 

    Oh, don’t let me leave you hanging. The item I wanted to buy that was “half price” was a trampoline. My daughter, Tesa, has two daughters and I thought it’d be a great gift for them. It actually was.   And it was “half price!” Where’s the line?!

 

    Elyse heads to find her own line (She’s been in the Air Force ALL of her life. Literally.). She’s watched me get in line all of her life. So, she, too, knows how to do that. I’m trying to figure out where they might have trampolines. AHA! Let me ask. I notice an already-frazzled manager walking by, so I stop her and ask her. She sighs, one of those “I wish I wasn’t here” sighs and tells me to follow her. She takes me way back to near the tire sales in the corner of the store. She points to this big pallet of boxes under a sign that says “Trampolines.” As I turn to thank her, she proclaims to me, and everyone around, that the sale starts at 2300. Please don’t take the boxes until then.

 

    What do people do when they’re told not to do something? What they were told not to do! That’s exactly what happens. The manager leaves and people start putting trampoline boxes on their carts. Now, let me tell you, in case you’ve never bought a trampoline. If you have, you know what I mean. Those boxes are heavy, Man! I’m not sure what the actual weight is, but they have to be several hundred pounds. People are struggling to put their boxes on their respective carts and the carts are barely able to hold them up. And, of course, they don’t fit INSIDE the cart. You just kinda set the box on the cart just to roll it over to the cashier. (BTW, all of the cashier stations are manned for this event! If you shop at Walmart, you know what a surprise that is.) 

 

    I’m watching all of these folks put trampoline boxes on their carts and I get to thinking that I better do the same, before they’re all gone. And it seems to be the American thing to do. I’m ALL IN!

 

    As I huff and puff, attempting to get this incredibly heavy box onto the cart I “borrowed” from someone who wasn’t paying attention to their cart, hence not protecting it, and you know, you snooze you lose, I hear a voice like out of the heavens ask, “How you doing, Chief?!”

 

    Time stops. Like in the movies. I look around and everyone has frozen in their steps. I look toward the source of the voice only to see a couple of my cadets.  At the time I was teaching at the United States Air Force Academy’s Center for Character and Leadership Development. Every cadet had to go through my class. It was a graduation requirement. Which means that they all knew me. “How you doing, Chief?” 

 

    “I’m fine,” is my reply. “How are you?” “We’re good. Whatcha doing?” Okay, so what am I going to tell them? “I’m violating what the manager just admonished us are the rules for tonight’s sale. THAT’S what I’m doing!” Okay, Okay, I think it, but, luckily, I know the difference between outer voice and inner voice. I keep it inner voice. “Just trying to make my granddaughters happy,” is my lame reply. “Oh,” they say as they look at each other, then at me, obviously, not sure what I mean. “Well, have a good evening,” they smile, as they keep looking at me.

 

    Look. I’m on a fixed income. This item is “half price.” If I don’t take it now, I may not get one. You’d do the same thing, wouldn’t you? Don’t judge me. We’re no different. 

 

    Folks, they’re watching! Always! Our followers, our students, our kids. They’re watching us. It’s how they learn. It’s how WE learned. If we’re going to be Leaders of Character we have to live up to, and value, integrity in everything we do. We have to be ALL IN! ALL THE TIME! We have to model what we want others to learn from us. What they see is what they’ll be. (Whew! That was a good sermon, wasn’t it?)

 

    I choose to do the right thing. I put the trampoline box back on the pallet. And I become the sheriff. It’s fun, actually. I stand there and, in my command voice, tell folks who are about to put a trampoline box on their cart that the sale won’t start for another half hour or so and that they are not to take them until then. It’s amazing what people will do, or not, when you act with authority. Oh, I get plenty of dirty looks, but I’m used to that. I’m a Chief!

 

    Finally, 2300 (11 PM) arrives, I put one of the trampoline boxes on my cart, I look over to see my cadets, but they’re gone, and I pay “half price” for my item. The hardest part is getting that stinking box in my Jeep. As I’m about to walk away, that stressed-out manager comes over and thanks me for maintaining control of that pallet, which was empty by 2305, by the way. Kinda makes me feel good to do the right thing.

 

    Integrity is doing what’s right when no one is watching AND when EVERYONE is watching. Someone is ALWAYS watching! Do the right thing anyway. We learn by watching. Make sure that what people are watching you do is BEING integrity.

 

    Until next time, be GREAT! You ARE!

 

                ¡HEIRPOWER!

 

                            bob vásquez!

HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

I walk into my home and see my lovely bride, Deb, smiling. “Hey, Baby,” she says. “Hey, Baby,” I reply, “How are you?” We go on, asking the usual questions about each other’s day, how it went, what we did, etc. Then we get to a critical part of the conversation.

    “You know,” Deb says, “I was talking with Lori today.” Lori was married to one of my colleagues. “Oh?” I asked, “what about?” “Well, we were just chatting when she mentioned something about you guys being gone for Thanksgiving.”

 

    I was on active duty when this occurred. I was assigned to the United States Air Forces in Europe Band at the time, stationed in Germany. One of the coolest things we did in that band, and I take at least partial credit for creating the concept, was that we deployed a big show we called Seasons’ Greetings to locations where our troops were. We had great success with those shows because we brought in artists from the US and did a big production for our troops and their families, similar to a USO show. I’d had this great idea of playing for the troops (no families there) stationed in Bosnia for Thanksgiving Day! I’m sure you’re saying, “What a GREAT idea!” Everyone I’d talked with said the same thing, “What a GREAT idea!” With one exception….

 

     “Lori told you we’d be gone for Thanksgiving?” I asked Deb, trying to sound as if…okay, the OC Factor kicked in. “Oh, Crap!” was all I could think of. In my zeal to get the show together and make it a great event for the troops, I’d forgotten, no kidding, I’d just forgotten, to tell the most important person in my life what I was up to and that it would affect her and the girls since I wouldn’t be there for Thanksgiving dinner.

 

    Here’s the point. Remember that old saying, “information is power?” That’s stupid! Information is just information. It won’t get up and do anything powerful! It’ll just sit there, sometimes in your brain, and do absolutely nothing! Imagine being the smartest person in the world and no one knowing it? What good would that be? SHARED information, APPLIED information is power. 

 

    Sometimes people who call themselves leaders think that keeping information from followers is power. That’s REALLY stupid! When we empower others with the information we have, it makes us ALL more powerful and it builds trust. 

 

    If you’re looking to be effective, whether it’s at work or at home, ask a critical question often, “Who needs to know?” Don’t you make decisions based on the information you have at hand? Well, imagine having all the information you need! Where would THAT come from? If you have people keeping you informed, then you’re liable to make better decisions. And the law of reciprocity says that when you inform others, they, in turn, inform you. You get what you give.

            

    If you’re wondering what ever happened that Thanksgiving, we did do the tour. In fact, there’s another story I’ll consider sharing with you about a very cool thing that happened on that tour. But not here. Deb and the girls understood my purpose and they supported me being gone that Thanksgiving. And I’m almost done paying for that BMW I had to buy Deb to make up for it. It’s a very nice car, I must say. SHARED information, APPLIED information is power. Have a very Happy Thanksgiving!

            

    Until next time, Be GREAT! You ARE!

 

                        ¡HEIRPOWER!

 

                                                            bob vásquez!

 

Help helps

Years ago, I added Yoga to my daily startup routine. I enjoy it because it helps me get in the right frame of mind to start my day. It’s a form of meditation as well as stretching. I prepare my mind and my body for the day. Anyway, not too long ago, I decided to add a couple of minutes of meditation, which I’m not very good at, to begin each session. I do this via an audio recording of the Yoga Master Rodney Yee.  

    It's almost interesting that I found that although those additional two minutes of pure meditation, which is just a clip from the rest of the audio recording, are meant to help me relax and just be, before I do, it’s very difficult for me…until Sensei Lee starts talking and tells me to do what I was supposed to be doing without his guidance. Once he tells me to relax I do so much more effectively. Help helps.

 

    I grew up in a culture where being “manly,” even “macho” (a term which was bastardized by The Gringo), was how I was supposed to behave. Serving in the military didn’t help that. Especially as a senior leader. I learned to “power through” whatever ailed me. I was a leader, by God, and leaders don’t let their followers see them sweat. (I even said that to some of my proteges.)

 

    There’s nothing wrong, and a lot RIGHT, with seeking help. Most of us aren’t so good that a little help might not help us empower ourselves to be even better. Sometimes we call that help accountability partners, sometimes we call them coaches, we even call them physicians and mental health providers. My best help, though, is my bride. She guides me a LOT! Except when we have to decide where to have lunch….

 

    I coach and mentor many folks. None of those relationships are formal. I just do it for them as needed and wanted. And, interestingly, they coach and mentor me in return. 

 

    Humans are relational beings. We need help to be our best selves. Unfortunately, there’s a stigma attached to seeking it. I’ll go out on a limb and say that it’s probably more difficult for men to seek help than women. Women are a lot smarter than men. That’s the truth!

    If you aspire to be a leader, especially an Effective Leader, you’re going to need help. None of us does it alone. Speaker and author, Rene Brown, talks a lot about vulnerability and its importance to our health. Effective Leaders are vulnerable. And their followers appreciate them for it.

 

    I’m going to continue to strive to reach enlightenment for a couple of minutes without Master Lee every morning. I’m not sure I’ll reach it. But I do know that I’ll come closer once I hear his voice. Help helps! Seek it when you need it. Unapologetically! We all need it. It will help you be you. And we need you to help us be us!

      Until next time, Be GREAT! You ARE!

 

                     ¡HEIRPOWER!

 

bob vásquez!

Is it time to lead?

Today’s one of those days that I’m totally bumfoozled! My body is telling me something different than my brain. My body is telling me how I feel. My brain is telling me how I should think. We just switched our clocks forward an hour. Or is it backward? See? I’m so confused! Who made that up? You mean we just told the sun what time to rise? Evidently. It’s amazing how much power we have! Or so it seems when we’re governed by the clock.

 

    The clock is a perspective that leaders use way too often in measuring success. How long have you been a leader? Does that matter? Probably not, but that’s a measure of a leader’s success, isn’t it? Time measures efficiency, not effectiveness. Just because you’ve been a “leader” for a long time doesn’t make you a good one, or one at all, for that matter.

 

    The term the Ancient Greeks used for measuring time by the clock was called Chronos. Chronos is quantitative, it’s easy to measure, as long as you have a clock or a sundial. It’s sequential. One event follows another. Leading isn’t that way, have you noticed? It’s confusing when you expect someone, a follower, to do things a certain way, and she doesn’t. And you’re bumfoozled by why she didn’t do it as you told her to. Maybe there was a better way? Maybe it wasn’t the right time?

 

    The other term the Greeks used for time is Kairos. Kairos means “the right, critical, or opportune moment.” What time do you start leading? When you get to the job or the office? Or when it’s the opportune moment? Do you lead only when you’re on the clock, on duty, or when someone needs your help or support?

 

    My favorite word in the English language is “serendipity.” Serendipity means “the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way.” I’m constantly aware of serendipitous moments, especially when opportune moments to lead appear. 

 

     Leading effectively can’t be based on a Chronos perspective. It has to be based on a Kairos perspective. When will that opportune moment appear in front of you? You won’t know, but it will happen. Will you step up and lead? If you do, it will be beneficial to you and the person you lead, and it may make both of you happy.

 

      I hope there’s a lot more leading going on than we think. I hope you lead more often than you even know. I hope that you take that opportunity to support someone when THEY need it, when a Kairos moment serendipitously arises. Don’t worry about when. Do it now. Right now’s the moment. It’s time to lead!

 

        Until next time, Be GREAT! You ARE!

 

                     ¡HEIRPOWER!

 

bob vásquez!